I'm Starving. Seriously.

Talked to my friend Kerry, OB/GYN nurse practitioner extraordinaire, who also had GD in her pregnancy.  She can't understand why Dr. McC did not send me directly to a dietician b/c apparently there is a lot more to the Diabetic diet than more protein, less carbs.  I've done research online but can't find a meal plan to follow, not that it would really apply to me since I don't eat eggs or meat and fish gags me these last few months.  So basically, I feel like I'm putting a grenade in my mouth every time I have a bite to eat.  The doctor said to start eating nuts, that "that could make the difference" so I'm a nut eating mofo which goes against everything I've read regarding food allergies in the unborn.  Would I rather Baby be diabetic or have a severe nut allergy?  Dear God, what a choice!

I'm so very hungry now that I've realized that 75% of my daily intake is simple sugar and carbs, all of which I've cut out completely.  Obviously, no soda, candy, Christmas cookies or ice cream for me and Sheemee.  But Kerry said there are carbs hiding in all kinds of other foods (buh-bye, milk craving) so I panic when I head to the cabinets.  Soup?  Graham crackers?  Microwave popcorn?  Carrot sticks?  I know I'm supposed to eat SOME carbs but I don't know what are good carbs and what are bad!  Eating has become so damn stressful.  I'm going to turn into a bowl of salad and brazil nuts.  I called the OB's office to ask why she didn't send me to a dietician (Kerry saw one for a 3 hour session when she was diagnosed and she does this stuff for a living!!! ) but, of course, they have been closed for the holiday since immediately after my appointment on Tuesday.  

Christmas has only made the suffering worse.  Butter cookies, pasta and cheesecake at my Mom's yesterday.  Every kind of Hershey's chocolate, apple pie, ice cream, pizza and chocolate chip cookies at my mother-in-law's today.  I swear, I almost dropped to my knees and wept when I saw the veritable buffet of sugar at Tom's parents' house this afternoon.  Only for my child could I resist that kind of temptation and resist it I did.  I'd be proud of myself if I wasn't exhausted and cranky from the sugar withdrawal.  If there is a methadone equivalent for carb addicts, I need it BAAAAAAAAAD.