Hold the Fudge After All

I am a very lucky woman.  My life is rich with blessings.  I have two healthy amazing children who would make any mother proud.  I'm married to my best friend who is a loving, supportive man.  I have a warm, comfortable home and a safe car.  I don't want a job and I don't have to get one.  I'm basically healthy.  I have friends who brighten my days and family who love me for who I am and who I have been.  Life is good.

Just got back from a routine OB appointment.  Apparently Dr. McC's nurse got her license out of a gumball machine b/c she was completely wrong in telling me that I was in the clear with the Gestational Diabetes issue.  I failed the fasting number that she said was slightly elevated and almost failed another number.  I'm borderline for GD and the OB is concerned.  She presented me with 2 options -- we can treat me like I am a diabetic which means I would start testing my sugars at home now or follow the diabetic diet for 2 weeks and then do another 3 hour test to see where things stand after the diet modification.  I'd like to avoid doing the daily finger stick if at all possible so we're going to go the diet route which is easier said than done for a carb-loving vegetarian.  Of course, she gave me no info on the diet aside from more protein, less carbs so I need to do some research (aahh, the joys of modern health care with its DIY approaches.)  I am disgusted that the fucking moron gave me false relief and I'm SO ANGRY that yet again, I'm sailing through rocky waters in a pregnancy.  Teetering on the precipice of a MAJOR pity party, I'm struggling with all my might not to give into the "poor me" attitude threatening to overwhelm me.  Hence the counting of the blessings above.  I've been repeating all of the wonderful things I have since I got the news because I am very lucky, very blessed.  We won't get into how the doctor mentioned "stillbirth" so casually as a possible but unlikely effect of GD.  Don't ask me what she said after that -- I couldn't hear anything over the rushing sound in my ears at the thought of losing my precious Sheemee.  

Enough of that.  I am a very lucky woman.  My life is rich with blessings...