My Grandmother Would Not Like How This Conversation Went

Natalie now reads to me most nights. It's a deliciously novel role reversal for both of us. Tonight, she read aloud part of "Disney Princess: Beautiful Brides." I know, I know, it's sexist and warping and old-fashioned and WHATEVER. Little girls love bride stuff. It's like crack to them except it won't make their teeth fall out or lead to cut-rate prostitution. Probably.

Anyway, we read about Aurora's dress choices and Ariel's vows -- No, sweetie, vows are not A, E, I, O and U. They are very serious promises that people make to each other. -- which led to a discussion of The Madam's understanding of marriage based on information from her kindergarten girlfriends.

N: Mommy, do people have to get married?

C: No, sweetie, people don't have to get married. It's a choice. Auntie's not married.

N: Will she ever get married?

C: Probably not.

N: Oh. *thinking* Well, Priya doesn't want to get married and Angelique said that everyone has to.

C: That's not true, babe. There is no law that says people have to get married.

N: Do you have to get married to get a baby?

UGH. Why didn't I anticipate THAT one coming?

C: No, you don't. It's better if you do though.

N: Well, I don't want to get married. I want to stay with you always.

I should have videotaped that to play back for her in 10 years when she can't stand to be in the same room as me.

C: That's fine with me. You can always be with me if that's what you want.

N: REALLY? I could live with you ALWAYS??? That's allowed?

C: Sure. Auntie has always lived with Gigi, right?

N: Yes! Then I will! And that will make it easier because then I'll have 3 people to take care of my baby!

Wait, what? What baby now?

C: Who are the 3 people?

N, eyes rolling: You, me and Daddy. And we can still go on girl dates because Daddy will watch my baby! It will be GREAT!!! *gleeful hugging*

C: Well, sweetie, you know, you could get married and live, like, really close to me. Seriously, we could be neighbors.

N: Nope. I don't want to. I'm sticking with you and we'll take really good care of my baby together.

My daughter, me and baby makes three. On the off chance things do play out that way, at least my Gram won't be around to see it. Oy vey.