He's trying to...hold the phone. Wait. WHAT?
C, trying to sound patient but achieving weary at best: Umm, what do you mean, Bud?
J: We're not supposed to hurt other people! God says so!
Well, yeah, I guess. But how did The Boy come to this realization between dinner and Bonnie's bedtime? I'm a little out of it lately but I'm pretty sure I'd know if a bible study group was meeting in my family room.
C: What makes you say that, buddy?
J: I saw it on Veggie Tales! They tell you what God thinks! It's a show with LESSONS!
So it is, son, so it is. And the lesson for me is -- I'm a big dummy for teaching you to access our Netflix queue through the Wii. Honorable mention for being idiot enough to add that damn movie in the first place.
Fucking Veggie Tales.
Tricking me with their movie cover art by throwing a brown hat on a piece of produce and using Indiana Jones's font in the title.
Screwing up our peaceful evening with values and stuff.
I'm pretty sure God thinks Jack should pound S anyway.
I mean, hi, look what He did to Sodom and Gomorrah. And the non-Hebrew firstborns in Egypt. That's some badass shit right there.
It's not like those little Egyptian babies were punching anybody on the bus but that didn't stop the angel from doing a drive-by on them.
So you get righteous like Jesus regulating on the money changers in the temple if that punk touches you again, little buddy.
What does a talking tomato and cucumber know anyway?
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